Pierogi
2000. This is a letter for you,
We have all seen that Kubrick movie,
2001. We all loved it, some of us still
do, and some of us wonder if computers are really going to be this crazy in
just 4 small years. In the year 2001 the
movie will be a fucking joke. The same
thing might happen with 2010 the movie, but let's not talk about that, it makes
me sick just thinking about it. Let's
talk about what is going to happen to your gallery in the year 2001. We predict that you will be very successful
in the year 2000. On New Year's day 2001, you will be a laughing stock, and will probably
have moved to Chelsea. People are going
to say: "That gallery used to be cool in the nineties, it was in Brooklyn
too". You don't want that to
happen.
But
don't worry, be happy, we can help. Our
solution is that on
New Year's Eve 2000, you change the name to Pierogi
2001, a year later, 2002, and so on.
We don't fool around, we also figured out an
easy way to do it which involves the logo we made for you. It's cheap, and if
you decide to buy it, it's even cheaper.
$250.00 will get you print-ready film and the rights to use it. Plus you'll get a contract that says when the
time comes we'll change it to 2001 for $75, and for $50.00 we'll change it to
2002. To 2003 for $25, and we'll teach
you how to change it yourselves in 2004 for free (maybe your computer will be
able to do it by itself by then, but we doubt it). If you want to buy the complete package at
once we'll only charge $325.00. You save
$75.00. Plus if you act now, we'll send
you are slides. So please reply by mail today, we're fuckin' serious.
God
bless Brooklyn (we used to live there),
A.K.U.S.A.